"People who suffer from Destination Addiction believe that success is a destination. They are addicted to the idea that the future is where success is, happiness is, and heaven is. Each passing moment is merely a ticket to get to the future. They live in the ‘not now’, they are psychologically absent, and they disregard everything they have. Destination Addiction is a preoccupation with the idea that happiness is somewhere else. We suffer, literally, from the pursuit of happiness. We are always on the run, on the move, and on the go. Our goal is not to enjoy the day, it is to get through the day. We have always to get to somewhere else first before we can relax and before we can savor the moment. But we never get there. There is no point of arrival. We are permanently dissatisfied. The feeling of success is continually deferred. We live in hot pursuit of some extraordinary bliss we have no idea how to find”
Dr. Robert Holden (2011) book: Authentic Success: Essential Lessons and Practices from the World's Leading Coaching Program on Success Intelligence
GENERAL INFO
Links and phone numbers throughout this site are live, tap to access.
Robert Holden: What is Destination Addiction
Joyful State of Mind: beware of destination addiction
The Psychology Today: The search for happiness
SELF-HELP
Talk to your GP/doctor or contact Your Crew to
help you such as help you speak to your parents or get you to your doctor.
If you feel at immediate risk call 000
Call Kids Helpline 1800 551 800
Stop, take stock of how you feel, check-in that feeling on YourCrew - this will help you to in the now and not avoiding it.
How to cure destination addiction and the PURSUIT of happiness? Abby Lewtas
"I'll be the first person to tell you that I still fall into the destination addiction trap from time to time. As with any addiction, I believe it all begins with regaining control of your mindset. Here are some actions that I have applied to my life to help me feel happy NOW!
- Apply person daily practices to help get present. E.g. Active stretching routine, meditation, exercise, get into nature.
- Think and FEEL about what in your life excites you right NOW?
- Tune in to what is actually going on for you in your life.
- Create awareness around your thoughts and actively choose a positive mindset for yourself. Choose to feel happy for no reason.
- Stop placing your happiness in things external to yourself...your relationship, your job or your next exciting holiday.
- Consciously set your day up for happiness and success.
Remember you always have a choice on how you show up. Your situation in life may not be picture perfect or your ideal. Let go of that mindset and start focusing in on your life and how you can be and feel happy now. Drop the idea that happiness and success is something that will come to you at the end of the road, the top of the mountain, when the championship roles around, when you reach that goal, that next holiday or you finally nail that job you wanted."
FORUMS, TOOLS & VIDEOS
Robert Holden - Destination Addiction - TEDxFindhornSalon
https://youtu.be/u5p7qoedlPU
Molly Maginnis - Destination Mentality
https://www.tiktok.com/@molly_maginnis/video/6920070993675406598
Crewing for or Helping Others
Sometimes, it can be hard to know what to do to support someone. You may feel stressed or scared you'll say the wrong thing.
Remember your main role as Crew or a supportive friend or family is to listen, acknowledge and communicate support. That can mean calling a professional service such as Kids Helpline or, in an emergency, calling 000 They can also guide you on what to do.
See How to Ask If Your Friend Is OK video
If you are under 18 years old, you can also reach out to an adult or your Crew to help you support someone.
See Professional and Urgent Help for a list of services with live phone numbers and links
See Pathways to Help
